Today was.. Ok

Im not sure how to put this day into words. When i woke up. my dad asked me what i was gonna do today and i answered " I'm not sure" and he replied.. " go be with chelsea?". i broke down. Where i stood is where i fell. i hurt so much inside. I'm not sure why but i do. Like i cant let it go.=[ i just wish for a day i could rewind. Rewind it all and do more then iv done. Be a better person then iv been. i rewind every day in my head. going threw every scenario, thinking what more could i have done. The rest of the day was normal. But im sick of normal. i want more.

But what.....